


Are we There Yet?

by shrimpette



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Beaches, Holidays, M/M, Road Trips, Try to lower your expectations a lot before reading it, all the cliches
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-10-09
Packaged: 2018-04-18 08:33:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4699277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shrimpette/pseuds/shrimpette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This trip was a disaster. First of all, Kiba's car broke. So Naruto had to borrow his mom's, and that meant that he would have to do the whole seven hours long ride on his own. Shikamaru was feeling sick, and Naruto was actually hoping that he would finally throw up because waiting for it, and jumping in his seat whenever the other boy opened his mouth was slowly getting tiresome. Chouji was grieving because Ino had dumped him after a two years long relationship. She wanted him to lose weight, and when he did, she decided that she wasn't feeling /it/ anymore. Whatever /it/ was. Chouji decided that the best way to cope with his sadness was eating it away. Naruto didn't really mind it but did he have to do it in his mother's car?! What was worse, Kiba loved to annoy him by saying that the seat just got smeared with soy sauce. He was doing it every half an hour or so. And then there was Sasuke, the last bastion of sanity. And the last bastion of sanity was getting annoyed. And Naruto knew how awful was irritated Sasuke. And how much it was his fault that the other boy was in a foul mood.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> SO. This will be silly, and there won't be a lot of plot, and it's full of silly, silly clichés, and it's going to have like two more chapters tops, and the only reason I'm writing it is to get rid of my writer's block. SO. You know, don't expect a lot. There's not much to begin with.

"Are we there yet?" Shikamaru whined loud enough for Naruto's ear to hear him over his favorite song, which just so happened to be playing on the radio. And it just so happened that Shikamaru chose that particular moment to ask the question for the umpteenth time that day. The blonde knew that his friend was suffering from motion sickness, and he did feel sorry for him but the never-ending whines weren't exactly helping him drive. Especially since it was his mom's car, and he was more than certain that his mom would kill him if anything was to happen to her _baby_. Naruto frowned. _He_ was supposed to be her baby, not that piece of... Of whatever metal cars were made of.

"No," Sasuke replied in Naruto's stead. He sounded annoyed. No wonder, he hated Kiba, and the feeling was mutual. Normally, Naruto would agree to ditching Kiba, and spending the last two weeks of Summer alone with his best friend but Kiba's mom owned a magnificent bungalow. And he invited all of them there; Naruto suspected that Sasuke was invited out of courtesy of Kiba's mom, and he was certain that Sasuke was well aware of it as well but the blonde still managed to convince him to come. Although now, since Naruto was driving, and the passenger's seat was taken by Shikamaru, Sasuke had to ride squeezed between Kiba and Chouji. The blonde could see his black eyes in the rear-view mirror, and they were narrowing with every passing minute. Actually, Naruto was amazed by the fact that they weren't fully closed yet. Especially since Sasuke's eyes were already naturally narrow. It was probably in his genes.

His mom was also able to do it, and she looked just as scary. Naruto shrugged, remembering that time when he broke her favorite vase, and convinced Sasuke to cover for him because he was afraid that Mikoto would ban him from the Uchiha household _forever_. He was maybe four years old at the time. And her narrowing eyes were the most vivid memory from his childhood days. His own mother kept laughing at him that he eventually came clear about the vase, begging Mikoto to spare her innocent son. Sasuke was also still amused by it. His mom wasn't. The knowledge that Naruto got so traumatized because of her, was still making her feel guilty. And this little fact was too considered amusing by Kushina. Everything was amusing. Naruto wished their ride could be equally amusing but it definitely wasn't.

First of all, Kiba's car broke. So Naruto had to borrow his mom's, and that meant that he would have to do the whole seven hours long ride on his own. Shikamaru was feeling sick, and Naruto was actually hoping that he would finally throw up because waiting for it, and jumping in his seat whenever the other boy opened his mouth was slowly getting tiresome. Chouji was grieving because Ino had dumped him after a two years long relationship. She wanted him to lose weight, and when he did, she decided that she wasn't feeling _it_ anymore. Whatever _it_ was. Chouji decided that the best way to cope with his sadness was eating it away. Naruto didn't really mind it but did he have to do it in his mother's car?! What was worse, Kiba loved to annoy him by saying that the seat just got smeared with soy sauce. He was doing it every half an hour or so. And then there was Sasuke, the last bastion of sanity. And the last bastion of sanity was getting annoyed. And Naruto knew how awful was irritated Sasuke. And how much it was his fault that the other boy was in a foul mood.

"We can take a break if you want," the blonde offered his sick friend, who nodded, a pained expression on his face.

"Oh, come on," Kiba scowled. "Just barf in a bag," he suggested.

"We could use a pee break," Chouji disagreed, munching on some crackers. His munching sounded _sad_. It shouldn't be physically possible for a human being to munch in a sad way. It was ridiculous.

"Pee in a bottle," Kiba suggested.

"Nobody's peeing in my mom's car," Naruto protested, frantically trying to find a place to stop. His heart stopped when he heard an opening flyer. "I'm going to throw you out of the car," the blonde warned his idiot friend. He heard a smacking sound, and a zipping one soon afterwards. "Thanks, Sasuke," Naruto sighed.

"So, when are you two going to get married and be boring together?" Kiba asked in a sweet voice. Naruto almost lost the control over the wheel. _Almost_.

"We're not going to get married," he huffed in irritation, hoping that his cheeks weren't red. Perhaps being seated next to sick Shikamaru, who couldn't be bothered with staring at him and examining his face, wasn't so bad after all. He was guessing that Sasuke and Chouji could notice something if they cared to look but Naruto doubted that they did. "I had a girlfriend, remember?" he asked to make his argument stronger. Hinata was his first girlfriend. She was sweet and cute, and he had absolutely nothing to talk with her about. So he broke up with her.

"Yeah, right," Kiba snorted. "A girlfriend, whom you were ditching whenever Sasuke did as much as _appear_ in your proximity," he chortled. "You're so fucking gay it hurts," he laughed.

"Shut up," Sasuke snarled. Naruto exhaled. A disaster was waiting just around the corner. Normally, he would laugh it off, blowing a kiss at Sasuke, and promising him to give him his ass tonight. But, unfortunately, it would hit a little bit too close to home. A month ago, when they ended up wasted in one tent after a party, they jacked themselves off. Naruto had no idea who started it and why, but he remembered Sasuke's orgasm face a little bit too well. They didn't talk about it afterwards. He was thankful for it. Especially since it was probably his fault anyways. Sasuke didn't really do stupid things on his own accord, it was usually Naruto talking him into it. Still, what they did _was_ pretty gay. So it had to be forgotten.

"Damn, you two are _so_ prissy," Kiba complained. "Am I right, Chouji?" he asked, visibly looking for anyone's approval. Unfortunately for him, being locked up with him on just a couple of square meters for six hours wore everyone off. Chouji mumbled out something non-committal under his nose, looking through the window. "Wow, I'm already regretting taking you _anywhere_ ," Kiba whined. "I bet you want to play board games and do other boring stuff-"

"There's nothing wrong with liking board games," Chouji interrupted him, probably to support suffering Shikamaru, who clearly wasn't able to fend for himself at the moment. "They can be very exciting," he added.

"Yeah, right," Kiba chuckled. "Oh, no, a fire dragon rolled five, how am I going to save myself?" he lamented, mocking the two.

"There's no such thing as fire dragon," Shikamaru whispered in a weak voice. Naruto rejoiced when he noticed a gas station sign. Finally. He'll finally be able to run away from his friends, and get some rest.

"No shit, Sherlock," Kiba muttered. "There's generally no such thing as _dragons_ ," he said. "You'd knew that if you left your house every once in a while-"

"Shut up," Sasuke hissed. He was touching his temples. So it was this bad already. Pissed off Sasuke with a headache. Exactly what Naruto needed to make this shitty day shittier. "Stop talking, I'm serious-"

"Or what?" Kiba inquired in a joyful tone.

"Oh hey, look, we're already at the gas station, like, wow, isn't it amazing?" Naruto interrupted them, hoping that going out will seem more enticing than killing one another. They didn't react. Only Shikamaru stumbled out from the vehicle, green in the face. Chouji soon followed him, visibly worried. Naruto had no idea why he was friends with Kiba. Some time ago it was Kiba, who was his best friend. He and Sasuke had a huge fight over... Now it seemed as if they had fought over nothing but back in the days he thought it was very important. And Kiba didn't like Sasuke, which was a quality Naruto desired in people back then. And it was only Kiba, who disliked Sasuke with a burning passion. Naruto mentally slapped himself across the face. Why did he do that? "Sasuke, weren't you saying that you're sleepy or something? Go get yourself a coffee-"

"Don't boss me around," the boy snapped. Naruto looked up, as if hoping that some god will appear and take him back home. None did.

"Sasuke, you could have said that you're having _these_ days," Kiba giggled. "You're probably unhappy because you don't have enough tampons-"

"Shut the fuck up," Sasuke growled. "You're fucking obnoxious-"

"Yeah, Kiba, that wasn't funny," Naruto interrupted the other boy to stop his tirade. Kiba rolled his eyes.

"Whatever, I'm going out," he said, leaving Naruto and Sasuke alone in the car. The blonde turned towards the other boy, sending him a sympathetic look.

"Sorry," he whispered. "I thought we'd have a good time together."

"I should stop listening to you. Whenever you're promising me a good time, it sucks," Sasuke complained. Naruto nodded in agreement. Perhaps if Sasuke was to vent his frustrations to him now, it would soothe his nerves, and they would survive the rest of the trip. "Kiba is a fucking imbecile," Sasuke added in a tired voice. "No wonder you're friends with him," he grunted.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean, eh?" Naruto cried in protest. "I'm not even friends-friends with him anymore, he just asked me to go with him, and I thought it would be fun-"

"It's not," Sasuke huffed. "It's anything but fun. This is the last time I went out with you," he muttered.

"Why is that?" Naruto questioned. "If you count out this trip, this Summer was pretty amazing," he noted. "We went hiking, and fishing, and there were all these parties, and we went camping-"

Naruto stopped half sentence. He shouldn't have said anything about camping. It was supposed to be wiped out from their memories, even if there was only one thing that ruined it-

"...camping was all right," Sasuke unexpectedly whispered back in a raspy voice. Naruto turned away from him, feeling his ears and cheeks getting hot from embarrassment. Sasuke probably meant other...activities. Fine. Naruto could play this game too. Pretending that it was just this one thing that didn't happen.

"Yeah, it was all right," he said, his hands shaking.

"How are we rooming in that stupid bungalow?" Sasuke inquired after a while of awkward silence. Naruto could almost hear chirping crickets. He breathed in. Sasuke probably wanted to make sure that they wouldn't be sleeping together. Well, that was to be expected.

"There are two bedrooms," he replied. "Shikamaru and Chouji probably want to room together, you can room with them, and I'll take Kiba," he said, mentally congratulating himself. "So you wouldn't have to spend even more time with him," he tried to laugh.

"I see," Sasuke said. He looked calm. So he really wanted to avoid sleeping next to Naruto at all costs. That was rather saddening. The blonde wasn't allowed to ponder over it furthermore because Chouji and Shikamaru returned to the car, taking their respective seats. "I'm rooming with you two," Sasuke informed them.

"Why?" Chouji asked out of the blue. The brunette shrugged his shoulders.

"Because I want to spare him Kiba," Naruto explained in a tired tone.

"We can take Kiba," Shikamaru offered, and Naruto forced a smile on his face. The boy has barely returned from the land of the dead, and he was already ruining his life. "We've decided on it a week ago, so don't worry, you two can have your own room-"

"We don't need it," Naruto insisted. "We can take turns or something-"

"What for?" Chouji questioned, his mouth full of peanuts. "Just enjoy it," he suggested happily.

"Yeah, Naruto, enjoy your newlyweds apartment," Kiba chortled, getting into the car. "Oops, I forgot Sasuke's on his period," he exclaimed, making a terrified face. "You know what they say, a real sailor isn't afraid of the red sea-"

"Watch it," Sasuke scoffed. "Or you'll need to use a tampon yourself-"

"Guys, guys," Shikamaru sighed like a true martyr, "Can you at least _pretend_ you're grown-ups?" he pleaded.

"Says the guy, who's still into pretend play," Kiba howled. "That's _rich_ -"

"I'm running out of patience," Naruto complained, resting his head against the wheel, and honking in the process. "This is the last time I'm driving you anywhere," he warned. "You have no idea how much I just want to leave you all on the sideway-"

"You brought me _here_ , you're bringing me _back_ ," Sasuke retorted, securing his return. Naruto sighed. This trip was an awful idea.

* * *

It got even worse when they finally got there. It was early evening, so they collectively decided to unpack and hit the beach to swim in the ocean. Naruto didn't want Sasuke to feel uncomfortable, so he skipped the unpacking, taking out only his swimming shorts and a towel. And he changed in the bathroom. That was definitely out of character for him. Normally, he would do it in the room, using the comforter as a cover. He didn't enter the room at all, leaving his baggage in front of the doors. When Sasuke emerged from it, he raised an eyebrow in a questioning manner but he didn't comment on it. Perhaps Naruto was overdoing it. Acting too straight was pretty gay too.

He breathed in, trying to calm his mind. If he played everything right, he'd be able to convince Sasuke that he had nothing to be afraid of. That they were still regular buddies. He'd come to appreciate it. Eventually. It would be much easier if Kiba wasn't gracing them with various stupid remarks.

"I've heard that you shouldn't be swimming it you're on your period," he lectured Sasuke, who was busy with reading. The boy glared daggers at Kiba, who shook off all the water on him as if he was a dog. "My sister said that if you'll do it, your tampon is going to get _huge_ ," he continued, probably just for the sake of continuing.

"It's cute that all of your experience with women is with ones that are related to you," Sasuke murmured in a sickeningly sweet voice. Kiba frowned at the remark. Naruto started to regret going to the beach. He was still tired from driving, and, what was even worse, he made the mistake of eating in front of Sasuke. And that meant no swimming for a whole hour. Because Sasuke didn't feel like 'saving his sorry ass.' Apparently, he had no problems with others dying. He probably just wanted a driver.

"Look, who's talking," Kiba retorted. It took him quite some time. Naruto knew that it wasn't because he was slow. It took him so long because he was weighing his options. He could've let it go but it seemed that his 'fuck it' attitude won. And this meant trouble. "Our local Casanova," Kiba chuckled.

"Out of the five of us only Chouji has any experience," Sasuke admitted in a tired voice. "And yet you're the one to yap the loudest-"

"And Naruto," Kiba pointed out, sitting next to the blonde. Naruto pursed his lips, hoping that Sasuke wouldn't tell the whole world that it really was just Chouji. His and Hinata's relationship was as devoid of anything relationship-related as it could get. Hell, if it wasn't for that camping, he still wouldn't be able to say that he had kissed anybody.

"...and Naruto," Sasuke relented. The blonde felt like hugging him. He truly was his best friend. He lied for him, and this wasn't an everyday occurrence. "It's still you, who can't shut up about it-"

"It's a natural part of growing up," Chouji stated. "Getting interested in sex, I mean. You can't blame Kiba for-"

"I _can_ , he's being obnoxious," Sasuke snapped.

"Chill out, man," Kiba suggested, sprawling himself on Naruto's towel. "Tonight we're going out, and it's going to be _legendary_ ," he promised. "Why are you so quiet, Naruto?" he inquired lazily. "That's totally not like you. I need my wingman to be in his top condition tonight-"

"Yeah, of course," the blonde replied, letting out a nervous laugh. The other boy patted his thigh, and he flinched. Maybe they all knew about what Sasuke and he did this Summer. Maybe Sasuke told them, and that was why there were so many innuendos. Naruto bit the insides of his cheeks. No, there was no way that Sasuke would tell them. He wasn't like this. He would mock Naruto, yes, but he wouldn't get anyone else involved. He wasn't exactly a social creature. "We're going to get all the girls-"

"Not when Sasuke is around," Shikamaru interrupted him. Naruto thought the boy was asleep but it turned out he wasn't. The blonde never knew it the boy was sleeping or not. It seemed as if sleeping was all he ever did.

"I'm not interested," Sasuke sighed.

"It doesn't matter," Shikamaru yawned. "So let's just give up, and have a guys night out," he proposed.

"Yeah, Sasuke, how come you're not interested in girls? Your testicles haven't dropped yet or what?" Kiba asked with a wolf-like grin on his tanned face. Naruto threw a handful of sand into his eyes and mouth to shut him up. Thinking that Sasuke and Kiba would be able to put aside their differences for whole two weeks was insane. They weren't able to do it even for one hour. "Dude, what was that for?" Kiba whined, spitting out the sand.

"For insulting Sasuke's genitalia, I believe," Chouji chirped happily, devouring a sandwich.

"What!" Naruto choked on the word, getting ridiculously embarrassed.

He probably should shut up, and remain passive for the duration of their outing. Maybe then he at least wouldn't screw up more than he already did. He got up, deciding that it was time to finally swim. He had to get away from his friends, cool down, rethink his strategy, and return to them with a foolproof plan of proving everyone that he was straight as an arrow. Because he was, right? And that...thing was just an accident. A stupid, stupid experiment. And they were both drunk out of their minds. It didn't count. They wouldn't have done it if they were sober. Nah-ah, no way, they weren't like this. They were... They were almost like _brothers_. Yup. That was it. So what if they were slightly closer than other guys? It was brotherly, and it was perfectly natural.

"You're going to drown," Sasuke informed him in a flat voice, when the blonde headed towards the ocean. Naruto breathed in, persuading himself that showing Sasuke the middle finger wasn't the thing to do. "At least tell me where you've left the car keys-"

"In my ass, you'll have to dig it out," he barked, readying himself to just run into the water. Oh great, that was another gay thing he said today. Why was everything so gay again? He started to wish to drown. Even if then Sasuke could say 'I told you so.' And Sasuke fucking loved to say that. What was worse, he had plenty of opportunities to do it.

"So we'll have to save him or his body anyways," Shikamaru said. "That's troublesome-"

"I'm not going to drown, I'm an excellent swimmer," Naruto retorted against his better judgement. "I could outswim all of you, just fucking watch me," he perorated. "And stop making plans for after I'm dead, that's fucking awful," he complained.

"Don't worry, bro, we'll throw you a magnificent funeral," Kiba promised him. "We'll steal a boat, put your carcass in there, and burn it. Chouji will sing for you, I'll say a few good words, Shikamaru will do an interpretative dance, Sasuke will carve you a tombstone-"

"Here lies an idiot," Sasuke snorted. Oh great, so now he and Kiba found a common language. Wonderful. Naruto shot them one last hateful look, and jumped into the ocean.

The water was pleasantly cool, and, what was even better, it was muffling the outer noises perfectly. He swam away far enough to be more or less separated from other swimmers. He had to survive two more weeks of this hell. Two weeks of spending each and every night with Sasuke in one room. Why did he want to come here again? He dived in, and opened his eyes underwater. They got stingy but the view was quite comforting. Maybe drowning wasn't such a bad idea. At least he wouldn't have to pretend he wasn't as gay-

Wait.

No. That wasn't it. He _wasn't_ gay so he didn't have to _pretend_. Yeah. So he and Sasuke fooled around once. It wasn't such a big deal. Sasuke was acting as if everything was in order. Naruto was probably just overreacting. Yup. No need to worry. He would swim a little while longer, return to his friends, and everything will be just as it used to be. Kiba will be annoying, Shikamaru will be lazy, Chouji will be as chilled out as he always has been, and Sasuke will... His brain had to hate him. There was no other explanation. Because why else would he think of that noise Sasuke made when he came? And no, it wasn't hot. At all. It was just... Something new. And surprising. Naruto returned to the surface, and started to swim faster. He had to make his body tired. If he'll be in pain, he won't have the time to think of stupid, stupid things.

It was a whole month already. Sasuke probably already forgot about it. But, then again... Sasuke was pretty weird. He's never had a girlfriend, and he's had plenty of opportunities to have one. Like Sakura. Sakura's crush on Sasuke was the reason of their biggest fight yet. Because it was unfair. Naruto was crushing on Sakura since forever, and yet it was Sasuke, for whom she had hots. Sasuke claimed he wasn't enticing her in any way but did he have to look so good and be so cool? _No_. Well, anyways. The fight was stupid. And it was all Naruto's fault. It was actually a miracle that Sasuke took him back.

Was Sasuke gay? He's never had a boyfriend either, and, what was more, he was usually hanging out with Naruto, so he didn't even have time to form any other serious relationship. Because with Sasuke it had to be serious. He didn't look like the type to resort to some one night stands. So... There was no way for Naruto to know. Well, the only sexual activity the boy had had was gay but... The same could be said of Naruto, and Naruto wasn't gay. The blonde sighed, breathing out a bunch of bubbles. What if Sasuke _was_ gay? It was a possibility. Would it change anything? Well, not really. They would still be the best of friends. Naruto would just have to lecture Kiba, so he would stop talking shit. Perhaps he should start now. Maybe then Sasuke would feel comfortable enough to come out to him. Yeah, keeping it bottled in had to be terrible-

But if he _wasn't_ gay, then Naruto fighting with Kiba could scare him away. Nobody wanted a gay best friend. The blonde lay on his back, floating on the water. Why everything had to be so complicated? It wasn't like this a month ago. He glanced at the shore, noticing Chouji waving at him. They probably wanted to go back to the bungalow, and prepare themselves for the outing. Naruto headed towards the beach, his thoughts just as chaotic as they were when he entered the water.

"Took you long enough," Sasuke grunted at the blonde when he approached his friends. Naruto frowned at the comment, finally understanding why shaking off like a dog was the first thing Kiba did. Sasuke was just asking for it. He copied the gesture, enjoying the displeased face the other boy made. "So neither of you can behave," he complained, wiping his chest with Naruto's towel. The blonde showed him tongue but the other boy ignored the obvious taunt.

"Excuse me but I _can_ behave," Kiba stated. Others sent him questioning looks. "I simply don't want to," he concluded with a shit-eating grin. Naruto tried hard to suppress the laughter boiling in his belly but he eventually gave in. Maybe this day was still salvageable.

* * *

It wasn't.

Naruto gaped in horror at the bed standing in his and Sasuke's room. Yup, that was a singular. Because there was just one bed. A pretty wide one but... Yeah, that didn't change anything. It was one bed. The last time he and Sasuke had shared a bed was when they were like ten years old. And that was _eons_ ago.

"So... We're going to take turns sleeping in the bed?" he asked, forcing his mouth to formulate the words. It was quite difficult since his jaw was still hanging low. Sasuke stared at him, looking as if he had no idea what Naruto was talking about. "Like... Today you'll sleep in bed, tomorrow I'll-"

"And where do you plan to sleep today?" he questioned. Naruto gulped. It was obvious, wasn't it?

"On the floor?" he tried.

"You can do whatever you want but I'm not sleeping on the floor," Sasuke decided after a while of hesitation.

"That's not fair!" Naruto exclaimed. "I deserve some comfort too," he grunted. The other boy's eyes widened.

"You know you can sleep on the bed as well, right? We'll fit in there no problem-"

"Yeah, that's exactly what we need," the blonde whined, slumping on the hated piece of furniture. "Kiba will never let us live this down-"

"We've shared a tent that was much smaller than this bed," Sasuke reminded the blonde. Why was he so cool about the whole deal? It was a real tragedy, and he was acting as if it didn't bother him at _all_. Sharing a bed would be weird even if they haven't done what they have, and now it was just asking for trouble. And Sasuke even had the audacity to mention sharing a tent.

"Well, yeah, but it's different when it's a _bed_ ," Naruto explained his friend.

"...because it's more comfortable?"

"No, you dork, because it's a bed," the blonde cried, rolling on his stomach, and letting out a frustrated groan. "Sometimes you're so fucking dense, I can't believe you don't feel like a hypocrite whenever you're calling me an idiot," he complained. "We _can't_ share a bed," he insisted.

"...why?" Sasuke inquired, closing the doors to their room. Naruto doubted the other three could hear them arguing, not with the music Kiba was blasting but closing the doors meant Sasuke wanted to have a serious talk. They sucked at serious talks. It was bound to end up on a full blown argument.

"Because..." Naruto tried to answer but couldn't find the right words. He couldn't just say that they were both guys because if Sasuke was gay, then he would get hurt, and that was the last thing Naruto wanted. But if he wasn't gay, then... Well, if he wasn't against sleeping in one bed, then maybe he really wasn't bothered by what happened a month ago. Maybe he too wouldn't mind it if his best friend was gay. Now that Naruto put some thought into it, being homophobic wasn't like Sasuke. All right, so... So why couldn't they sleep together? "I've told you, Kiba's going to laugh his ass off-"

"So what?" Sasuke interrupted him.

"So... So I don't want him to?" Naruto tried, and, judging from the other boy's expression, failed.

"Do you remember what you've told me when we went camping?" Sasuke inquired, sounding annoyed. Wonderful. That was exactly what Naruto needed. What was worse, he had no idea what Sasuke was referring to. It was obvious that it had to be something important but the blonde couldn't recall anything of the sort. Just some regular bickering. He shook his head. The brunette looked away, clearly disappointed.

"Forget it," he ordered.

"How can I forget something I don't remember?!" Naruto yelled at his friend. "Just tell me, like, what am I supposed to do now?"

"I don't care," Sasuke grunted, grabbing his shower gel, and going into the corridor.

"Don't just fucking run away, we are still talking!" Naruto whined, following him. "What have I told you?"

"I'm not talking to you anymore," the boy decided, disappearing in the bathroom. Naruto wanted to yell some more but he could hear the water going. Also, Kiba decided to show up. Kiba was the last person the blonde wanted to see right now.

"I've told you he's on his period," he chirped, patting Naruto's back. "Shikamaru, I won, they're already arguing," he yelled. Shikamaru entered the corridor, looking disappointed.

"Couldn't you wait till tomorrow?" he complained. Naruto turned to them, feeling the blood boiling in his veins.

"Were you betting on when we'll argue?" he asked although he considered it redundant. "You're such assholes," he whined, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"It shouldn't count, though. Kiba was provoking Sasuke all day long, no wonder he lost it," Shikamaru said, completely ignoring Naruto.

"Why is there only one bed in our room?" the blonde growled. "You're just fucking with us, right?"

"Nope," Kiba replied happily. "I'm not into gay threesomes so you'll have to find yourself someone else," he continued.

"How many times do I have to tell you that we're not gay?" Naruto snarled.

"Sure you're not," Shikamaru snorted. "Naruto, you don't have to hide, we _know_ , all right?"

The blonde stared at him for the longest time. If his lungs didn't start hurting, he would have forgotten to breath. They _knew_? What did they know? Did Sasuke tell them something after all? Naruto opened his mouth, choking on the air. It was a disaster. It was a goddamn disaster. His head was getting dizzy, and his limbs were turning into jelly. Kiba's worried face was the last thing he registered.

* * *

When he opened his eyes, he was welcomed by not one but four worried faces. And his forehead hurt. And he had no idea how he ended up on the floor.

"Do you feel like throwing up? Shikamaru asked. Naruto shook his head. He wasn't feeling too well but he was far from barfing. "I think he'll be fine-"

"He's still not going anywhere," Sasuke interrupted him. Sasuke was wearing just a towel. And he had wet hair. Did he leave the shower? What for? The blonde yawned. He was sleepy. Maybe giving everything a rest for today wasn't such a bad idea.

"Oh, come on, he has to come," Kiba disagreed. "Look, he'll take a shower, and he'll be good," he argued.

"No, he won't," Sasuke barked. "Besides, it's already decided."

"It's my decision, you bastard," Naruto mumbled out. "But yeah, tonight I'm going to sleep early. So go forth, and have fun without me-"

"We're not leaving you alone," Chouji protested. The rest nodded. Even Kiba. What a heartwarming picture.

"Dawww, so you _would_ care if I died," Naruto chuckled, folding his arms, and resting his head on them. "But what's happened to me? Like, how did I end up on the floor? Did you hit me out something?"

"No, you just...fainted," Shikamaru informed him. "After we told you we-"

Kiba chose that particular moment, to kick Shikamaru in the shin, making him stop talking.

"What do you know?" Naruto questioned.

"Nothing," Kiba replied. "We're like John Snow. Shikamaru hit you with the doorknob, and now he's trying to escape the responsibility-"

"Yeah, right, you can't lie for shit," the blonde told Kiba.

"What have you told him?" Sasuke questioned, sounding irritated. Actually, he always sounded like this. Maybe it was his default mode. And he was almost always wrinkling in his nose area. He would end up with massive wrinkles-

"That we all know that you're gay for each other," Shikamaru replied, kicking Kiba back.

"What?" Naruto gawked. Sasuke facepalmed. That reaction was quite appropriate. The blonde wished he had thought of it sooner. At least he knew Sasuke hasn't told them anything. That was a huge relief. Now they were able to keep their faces. "We're not gay for each other," he said.

"Told you," Chouji murmured, evidently pleased with himself. "Pay up-"

"You weren't betting on whether we're gay or not, right?" Naruto questioned in a tired voice, covering his eyes with his forearm. "I swear to gods, this is getting ridiculous. Right, Sasuke?"

He waited for an answer but he wasn't graced with one. He removed his arm from his face to look at his best friend but he wasn't there.

"Chouji, I think we all lost," Kiba sighed. "Nobody bet on only one of them being gay for the other"


	2. Chapter 2

"Holy shit, sorry, we were one hundred percent certain that you two were together," Kiba stated in a hushed voice. Naruto gawked at him. He was screwed. He was  _so_  screwed. He's never been so screwed in his entire life. He would much rather face a hungry t-rex than Sasuke. Because he had absolutely no idea how Sasuke felt at the moment, and he was sure that if he was to do one more mistake, there would be no way of fixing it. A t-rex would just want to eat him, so the solution to the problem was obvious. Running away. Quick. Yup.

"What do I do now?" he asked in a terrified voice.

"Suck him off," Kiba suggested. The blonde nodded, and the other boy waved his arms at him, visibly baffled by his inability to make reasonable decisions. "Don't do it," he muttered. "Man, but seriously though, how can you be  _not_  together?"

"We're not," Naruto replied. "Why would we be together? Like, we're just regular friends-"

"You two always know what the other one is doing," Shikamaru interrupted him. "And it's not just 'Oh, Sasuke's away,' it's more like 'Sasuke's at his grandma's, they're currently eating supper, later on they're going to a theatre'-"

"Well, excuse me for calling him every now and then," Naruto barked back.

"It's not  _every now and then_ , it's all the time," Kiba disagreed. "As if you were connected with an umbilical cord, it's actually rather creepy," he chuckled. "And you're always sleeping on his shoulder whenever we're traveling-"

"Shikamaru's doing the same with Chouji," Naruto protested.

"Shikamaru  _ends up_  sleeping on Chouji," Kiba explained. "You  _start_  with lying on Sasuke-"

"And he doesn't mind it," Shikamaru chimed in. "You call each others' mothers on holidays-"

"Now that's just common courtesy," Naruto whined. "Our moms are best friends, we pretty much grew up together," he added. "It's just natural that we're so close-"

"It's the same for me and Shikamaru," Chouji replied. "And we don't do it-"

"It doesn't prove anything, like, we're different from you, it's normal that our friendship is also different," the blonde sighed. His friends weren't making a lot of sense now. They simply saw what they wanted to see. And, for whatever reason, they wanted to see a blooming romance between him and Sasuke.

"He managed to never talk to Hinata," Kiba reminded him. "And  _somehow_  he was never available when she was supposed to be around," he snickered. "Yeah, actually this was the thing that made us suspect that you two are up to something-"

"And you preferred to sit in the library with him then go to the beach with your girlfriend," Chouji murmured. "Ino couldn't believe it. She went shopping with her, and she claimed that Hinata had bought an epic swimsuit-"

"It  _was_  epic," Kiba agreed with Ino's words.

Naruto glared at his friends. So he preferred the company of his best friend over a girl's he didn't even know. It didn't mean a thing. So he and Sasuke cared about each other. Whatever, this was the reason why they considered themselves best friends. Sasuke didn't like his ex? Well, these things happen. The only problem was that Naruto's friends could actually be right.

* * *

 

Naruto cautiously entered the room. It wasn't as if he thought that he would see Sasuke lying on the bed on the verge of tears - the boy wasn't exactly an emotional exhibitionist - but the blonde definitely didn't expect to see him dressed up and ready to go out. As if Sasuke wasn't the very person to insist on Naruto staying in.

"We should talk," the blonde stated the obvious. The other boy stared at him as if he was a monument of disappointment. "Seriously," Naruto added to make his argument stronger. It didn't work. Sasuke returned to looking for... Whatever he was looking for. "Don't just ignore me," he barked.

"We have absolutely nothing to talk about," the boy replied, sounding so composed that he had to be faking it.

" _Right_ ," Naruto sighed. He had a huge bump on his forehead. Perhaps he really did hit himself with a doorknob. The more worrying part was whether Sasuke was gay. And Naruto had no idea if asking about it in a straightforward manner was the thing to do. Probably not. On the other hand, tricking his best friend was pretty much impossible. Especially right now. The blonde breathed in, preparing himself for the worst. The worst, of course, was being knocked out for asking stupid questions. "So," he started. His throat suddenly felt dry, so he coughed. "Are you gay?"

"Why do you care?" Sasuke's question came right after Naruto closed his mouth.

"I don't," the blonde protested. It came out wrong."I mean... I do care but it doesn't change anything," he tried to explain. "And I care because..." Actually, he had no way of replying to it. An ingenious question. It wasn't his business. At all. Sure, he  _wanted_  to know but... "...you're my best friend and I care about you? And then... Like, there was... Well, you know what we've done, and I think we kind of  _should_  talk about it?" he mumbled out. Sasuke didn't look persuaded. "Like, you know, it would be the right thing to do?"

"I fail to see how my sexual orientation is a factor in any of this," the boy muttered. "It wasn't so for  _you_ ," he grunted.

"Wow, okay, fine," Naruto blabbered. All right, it was a progress. Rather small but still - it was  _something_. At least they were having a conversation. "Yeah, I guess you might've thought I'm into guys after all of  _that_ ," he admitted. "It's pretty logical-"

"No shit," Sasuke replied. His eyes seemed tired. He generally looked tired. It wasn't too weird, after all there was this disastrous seven hours long ride, and the beach, and now they were supposed to go wild in a local club... Yeah, anyone would be tired. Especially with Kiba around.

"It's not like I  _hated_  it," the blonde confessed.

"I don't care," Sasuke said, massaging his temples. He plumped on the bed, his long legs hanging from it. So he gave up on going out. That was a plus. Now they simply needed to fix their friendship, and then everything would return back to normal.

"Look, I might give it a try again," Naruto offered. "This time we're sober-"

"I don't want to," Sasuke hissed. "Forget it," he ordered. Naruto pouted at him but the other boy had no way of noticing it. The blonde huffed, hoping that if he was to voice his irritation, it would be finally acknowledged. It wasn't. It was always like this with Sasuke. Naruto never knew what the other boy was thinking at the moment. He sat next to the brunette, studying his features. Sasuke was, objectively speaking, handsome. The blonde leaned over him, wondering if the boy would send him flying into the wall if he was to kiss him. Yeah, he probably would. "Back off," Sasuke grunted.

"It's your fault as well, you know," Naruto complained.

"It's not," Sasuke disagreed. He seemed so sure of it that it was terrifying. "You lied to me, you started it-"

"Fuck, I knew it," Naruto gasped. "I mean, I knew it had to be me who started it," he explained. "But how did I lie to you?"

"Take a wild guess," Sasuke growled. He wasn't amused. His irritation was transforming into anger. And this was bad news.

"...I guess I told you something, what would imply that I was into guys," the blonde guessed.

"Into me," Sasuke clarified. Yes, of course. For now, other men could be taken out of the equation. They didn't matter.

"...yeah, so, anyways," Naruto mumbled out. "Others have gone out, so it's just you and me in here, and, like I've said before, I'm willing to give it a try again," he repeated the proposition. He didn't really have anything else to offer. And he had no idea what he had said. If he knew, things could be slightly easier. Or harder.

"What for?" Sasuke questioned, turning his head to look at him. He had dark circles under his eyes. It was clear that he was exhausted and unhappy. Naruto sighed. This trip was supposed to be nothing but fun.

"I don't know, like, it seems that you are disappointed that I might not be into you, and, well, who knows, maybe I actually  _am_ ," he blurted out in one breath. There, he said it. "So let me just check if-"

"I'm not going to be your  _experiment_ ," Sasuke scoffed. "Let's just forget about the whole deal," he pleaded. "You were drunk, you had no idea what you were saying and doing, and I treated it too seriously. Maybe it actually  _is_  my fault," he grunted. "It doesn't matter now. I'll recover, so nevermind it-"

"What have I said?" Naruto asked, lying next to Sasuke, who stared back at him. "I deserve to know," the blonde argued. At last, it seemed that the other boy finally agreed with what he was saying. But he did roll his eyes to show how much pointless he considered it as.

"That I was your everything," the brunette replied. Naruto nodded.

"You are," he said. "I don't know if it's in a yes or a no homo way but you do mean the world to me-"

"Shush," Sasuke ordered, pinching the bridge of his nose. "How's your head?"

"I have one horn growing out of my skull but aside from it, everything's fine," Naruto answered. "So," he started, drawling out the word into infinity and beyond, "you  _are_  into guys-"

"Maybe," the brunette replied, making it sound casual. How was he able to do it, Naruto had no idea. It was probably a gift. Or, once again, genes. "I'm into you," he said unexpectedly. "I'm definitely not into Kiba or the others," he snorted.

"I never thought you'd be the one to fetishize blondes," Naruto murmured. Somehow, nothing's really changed. He felt as if he's found out that his best friend's real hair color was red, and not black. It was a little bit surprising but it wasn't life changing news. "We could still join the guys in the club if you want to," he offered. "I could use a drink-"

"Me too," Sasuke agreed. "But you've got yourself hit pretty hard, so don't overdo it-"

"Sure,  _mom_ ," Naruto chuckled. "I finally understand why my mom was agreeing to anything as long as I said that you'd be there," he mused. "Like, oh hi, mom, I'm going to the moon," he said. "Honey, that doesn't seem like a very good idea," he replied to himself, pretending to be his own mother. "Sasuke's going to be there-. Oh, I see, then say hi from me,"

"That's because both me and your mother know that I'm not an idiot, and that you definitely are one," Sasuke suggested, visibly holding his lips from curling upwards.

"Oh,  _wow_ , so  _this_  is how you treat the person you like," the blonde exclaimed, barely escaping Sasuke's hand of doom. It plopped on his chest, dealing almost no damage. As if he didn't put his heart into it. "I was kind of abusing it when we weren't friends," he confessed. "I mean, the fact that my mom would let me go virtually anywhere if I said you were going to be there. And, of course, once again, sorry. That was me being an idiot back then-"

"Told you so," the brunette sighed. "I knew, mine kept asking me since when I became friends with Kiba. And why he'd never visited me. You're lucky both of my parents are rarely home-"

"So you were covering for me," Naruto realized. "Wow, I really was a dick," he sighed.

"You were," the brunette agreed. "But it happened a five years ago or so. I'm pretty much over it. Let's get going," he suggested.

Naruto nodded, getting up from the bed. It really was huge. Perhaps sharing it was far less of a problem than he had anticipated it to be. He grabbed his cosmetics, a towel, and a fresh change of clothes to get a shower, leaving the brunette alone in the room. When he was finished, he heard the doors to the bungalow opening. He headed towards the living room - or whatever it was to Kiba's mom - to see his friends. Kiba looked unhappy, Chouji amused, and Shikamaru relieved.

"What, why are you already here? We wanted to join you," the blonde greeted the three. The boys looked back at him, and slumped on the sofa.

"There's only one club in here," Kiba muttered in a grave tone. "And it's full of old people. I had no idea this town was so boring," he complained. "How's Chouji supposed to unwind after all that's happened to him-"

"I'm doing fine, no need to worry about me," the boy snickered. "And girls were actually hitting on you. I have no idea why you wanted to leave so badly-"

"They were  _pensioners_ ," Kiba exclaimed. "One of them said her husband was already  _dead_ ," he added, sounding terrified. "Why are they so lively?! They should be knitting or petting cats-"

"I don't know, I kind of envy them," Shikamaru yawned. "And she wasn't hitting on you, she just called you a handsome young man. She even said that you remind her of her grandson-"

"Yeah, that was creepy," the boy shrugged.

"It's just what old people say," Shikamaru stated in a matter-of-fact way. "You've just panicked-"

"She asked me out," Kiba yelled, hitting himself in the chest, as if to prove that what he was saying, was true. Naruto tilted his head. At first his friend's story sounded creepy but Shikamaru made it look... Well, as if Kiba did panic.

"She just said where she was staying," Shikamaru sighed. "Seriously, you're overreacting-"

"So we have nowhere to go," Sasuke, who, as it turned out, was standing right behind Naruto, concluded. "Thanks, Naruto, this place really is great," he muttered. Chouji snorted. The blonde glared daggers at him. It wasn't  _his_  fault.

"I bet there are some cities nearby," he grunted. "We've passed one on our way here. But I'm not driving you anywhere today," he added. Even the thought of taking the wheel made him feel sick. "So we can either get wasted here or go to sleep-"

"I need to get wasted," Kiba interrupted him. Sasuke disappeared in his and Naruto's room to return with three bottles of booze. Then he stood awkwardly in the doorway as Kiba hugged him as if he was the savior of the universe. "I never thought I'd say it but you're actually pretty great," Kiba howled. "And you're totally not on your period-"

"Just shut up and drink," Sasuke sighed. The other boy let go of him, grinning like a madman. Naruto smiled at them. Perhaps not everything was lost.

* * *

 

"So," Kiba mumbled out, looking rather dumbfounded, "Naruto is a chick-"

"No, I'm an elven priestess," the blonde protested. "So back off or I'll smack you with my mighty hammer," he threatened the other boy. Somehow, Chouji was able to convince Kiba to try playing a tabletop. Shikamaru agreed to being a game master, and while he had looked unusually fired up at the beginning, now it seemed that he was regretting it a lot.

"Whatever," Kiba relented. "So, I'm looking for a guy with an exclamation mark above his head," he decided.

Shikamaru glared at him. Chouji snorted. Sasuke clearly had absolutely no idea what was going on.

"There is no such person," Shikamaru muttered with a grave expression on his face.

"Then how am I supposed to find myself a quest?!" Kiba cried, waving his arms and almost spilling the alcohol. "I'll never level up if this is how it's going to look like-"

"This isn't like a computer game," Shikamaru whined. "Please, just focus. Sasuke, what are you doing?"

The brunette gawked at him, visibly struggling to answer the question. Then his face lit up. "Can I attack Kiba?"

"...yes but why would you do that?" Shikamaru replied with a question, rubbing his face. Naruto smiled at him in some weak attempt to lift his spirits. It failed. "You're in one team, why would you sabotage yourself?" the boy asked. Sasuke shrugged his shoulders. "Chouji..."

"I'm looking for an inn," he said, clinking his glass with Naruto.

"... Sasuke's attacking Kiba, and you're looking for an inn?" Shikamaru inquired. It was clear that he had put some hope in Chouji but now his face resembled that of a man, who gave up on everything. It was a heartbreaking sight. Chouji nodded. Kiba was still gawking. He probably still didn't processes the fact that he was under attack. "Naruto?"

The blonde bit his bottom lip. All right, he was Shikamaru's last hope. What would an elven priestess do?

"I think I'll go with Chouji," he mumbled out. "I hate violence-"

"You've been threatening Kiba with a hammer," Shikamaru reminded him. "And you don't even  _have_  a hammer," he uttered. "All you have is a regular staff-"

"Precisely," Naruto replied. "Because I hate violence-"

"Why would you attack me?!" Kiba cried. Sasuke shrugged his shoulders again. "I thought we were brothers-"

"You're not brothers, you were just born in the same town-"

"Yeah, what are the odds?" Kiba whined. "Two adventurers coming from the same town. I bet we are family-"

"You're a dwarf, and Sasuke's human," Shikamaru muttered. "You're not related-"

"Maybe I'm just really short," Kiba mumbled out. "Whatever. Dwarves are tough, right? Bring it on, Sasuke," he taunted.

"You're making me hate this game," Shikamaru complained, preparing dice.

Soon after, Sasuke was arrested for attacking Kiba. Then they tried to help him escape a prison, which wasn't the easiest thing to do with Kiba sabotaging Naruto's and Chouji's plans. In the meanwhile, Sasuke fell asleep, his head tilted backwards, and his mouth open.

"You could use it as an ashtray," Kiba slurred. "By the way, it seems that you two are cool again," he noted. "I thought we'd really have to throw you that funeral-"

"And yet you left me alone with him," Naruto whined. He grabbed Sasuke's head and propped it on his shoulder to spare him neck pain. "You've got me thinking," he confessed. "I mean, I like him a lot-"

"He's all right," Kiba yawned. "But don't tell him I've said that or he'll get full of himself," he snickered. "He used to be such a dick back in the days," he mused. "He called me a dumbass more times than I cared to count," the boy murmured. "And he was so good at everything-"

"Yeah, that was awful," the blonde agreed. "Wow, I think our game is over," he chuckled. "We have a system failure," he said in a hushed voice, pointing at Shikamaru, who was also sleeping.

Chouji got up, gesturing Kiba to help him transport his friend to the bed. They haven't drunk much but exhaustion did half of the work. The two boys left. Naruto turned his head to look at Sasuke, who was currently drooling on his t-shirt. He hoped that Kiba would return because carrying Sasuke into their room without waking him up was pretty much impossible. And the boy was rather cranky if someone woke him up.

"I could help you out, and then we'd finish the bottle," Kiba proposed upon getting back. He wasn't able to walk straight but probably none of them was. "Chouji went to sleep," he informed Naruto. "I've never seen him really drunk," he complained. "I wanted to get him totally wasted in here-"

"We can try," the blonde agreed, gently grabbing Sasuke under his armpits, and slowly getting up. Kiba was holding the boy's legs. They carried him into the room, and laid him on the bed. "He hates sleeping in his clothes," Naruto murmured.

"I'm not undressing him," Kiba protested. "I bet he'd hate it more if he was to learn that I was messing with his pants. He's saving that dick for you-"

"Shut up," the blonde hissed. "I think I'm going to sleep after all," he yawned, laying next to Sasuke. He closed his eyes, promising himself that he wouldn't fall asleep like this. He had to change into pajamas. And brush his teeth. He gasped when he was shoved closer to the brunette. "What are you doing?" he complained, turning his head to look at Kiba, who sprawled himself right next to them.

"Shikamaru's always snoring after alcohol," the boy mumbled out. "And since this thing between you and Sasuke hasn't worked out, you don't need a newlyweds apartment-"

"I'm  _touched_ ," the blonde interrupted him.

"You should be," Kiba agreed, clearly not realizing that Naruto didn't mean what he said. "Once we thought you two might be a couple, we realized that being out in our high school is rather difficult," he murmured. "But here you'd be able to relax and chill out," he continued. "Why else would I invite Sasuke and not Shino?" he questioned.

"I thought your mom made you do it," the boy replied. Now he really was touched. His friends turned out to be pretty thoughtful. And he wouldn't have suspected them of it. Especially not Kiba.

"Come on, I'm not five years old," Kiba chuckled. "Give me some credit."

"Thanks," Naruto whispered.

"How is he taking it?" the boy asked. "He looked quite broken-hearted when you've publicly rejected him-"

"I had no idea I was doing it," the blonde complained. "I keep being a total dick to him without meaning to," he said. "And it's not like I've totally rejected him. I was willing to give it a try but he didn't want to-"

"Wow, nobody likes having their hopes first raised and then crushed. I mean, have you seen Shikamaru today? I bet he thought we'd fall in love with his geek stuff, and now he hates it too," Kiba pointed out. The blonde considered it for a while. Perhaps he was right. Maybe drunk Kiba was like a sage, giving the best possible life advice. "And what do you mean by giving it a try? You already act like a couple, there's nothing more to try-"

"We don't act like a couple," Naruto protested in a hushed voice.

"Yeah, and yet somehow I can't imagine him having a relationship while being your friend," Kiba blurted out. "His SO would be constantly jealous of how much time and thought he's devoting to you," he explained. "And it works both ways. Hinata wasn't happy with how close you and Sasuke are-"

"I have no idea if I'm attracted to guys," the blonde whined. "Like, I never thought about it, all right?" He opened his eyes to look at Kiba, who was half asleep. Then it hit him. His friend was a guy. "Kiba," Naruto started, feeling his throat tighten from nervousness, "I need to ask for a huge favor from you," he whispered. The other boy gestured him to explain what it was. "I need you to make out with me-"

Kiba blinked a couple of times, his mouth agape. "Forget it," he decided. "The sole fact that you want to make out with me should tell you that you're into guys," he added.

"I don't  _want_  to," Naruto huffed. "But I owe him this. So I kind of  _need_  to, and you're the only person I can count on-"

Kiba glared at him. Then he sighed, giving in. "It's going to stay between the two of us," he muttered. "Or you'll really need that funeral-"

"Sure," the blonde agreed before Kiba would change his mind. "So... Could you like initiate it or something?" he pleaded. The other boy rolled his eyes, and smooched him on the lips. It lasted no more than one second. "And now act as if I  _wasn't_  your sister," Naruto suggested. "That was so chaste-"

"Shut up," Kiba grunted. "I just gave you my first kiss, fucking appreciate it," he added. "And you're really not my type," he complained. The blonde grinned at him, what seemed to infuriate him. "Whatever, let's do it," Kiba decided. He sounded nervous. His hand cupped the back of Naruto's head, forcing him to get closer. His lips brushed against the other boy's, and then his booze and chips tasting tongue entered the blonde's mouth-

"What the fuck are you two doing?" Sasuke muttered, poking Naruto's back. Naruto was so shocked that he ended up biting Kiba, who cried in pain. The blonde felt the body behind him moving, and soon enough two shifty black eyes were glaring at him, studying the whole scene.

"It's nothing," Kiba lied, looking absolutely terrified.

"Nothing my ass," Sasuke decided. "What are you even doing here? I thought you were supposed to sleep in the other room," he noted.

"Shikamaru's snoring," Naruto mumbled out, trying to withstand Sasuke's stare. "So, how long were you awake?" he inquired, hoping it sounded casual. Judging from the frown on his best friend's face, it didn't.

"Long enough," was the answer.

The blonde gulped. Why was he so stupid? While it was true that waking up drunk Sasuke was pretty much impossible, it turned out that he and Kiba were still able to do it. Naruto thought over the last couple of minutes. All right, it wasn't this bad. But it wasn't good either.

"Yeah, you know what? I think I'm going to sleep in the living room so bye," Kiba blurted out, jumping out of the bed, and darting out of the room. This was the moment when Naruto felt like a protagonist of a bad horror movie. He knew that there would be a goddamn monster if he looked over his shoulder but he still turned his head to face his best friend, who was wearing an unreadable expression.

"You don't owe me anything," the brunette informed him in a calm voice. "I shouldn't have had to say that but you're a total moron and you might end up fucking a complete stranger," he added in a tired voice, rubbing his eyelids with straightened fingers.

"I'm just trying to make sense of all of this," Naruto complained. "And you refused to help me out-"

"You don't have to try every dish on the menu to check if you'll like it or not," Sasuke barked back. "If you're not interested in me, then you're  _not_  and there's no helping it-"

"For fuck's sake, Sasuke," the blonde whined. "You're not  _food_. Who in the world would compare love life to food? Only a total idiot would," he snorted. "Remember my relationship with Hinata? To this day, I have no idea why I was dating her," he confessed. "Apart from the fact that she's a girl and she likes me, of course. I just kind of assumed that this was how it worked like for everyone. And in movies guys are always much closer to their male friends than they're with their girlfriends, and I believed that everything was perfect," he explained. "But it wasn't, right? So I came to accept the fact that I would choose you over any girl, assuming that we were best of friends, freaking soulmates if you'd like," he continued. "But then there was... You know what," he mumbled out, "And at first I thought it was one big mistake but perhaps it  _wasn't_ -"

"Has it occurred to you that  _I_  might not be interested?" Sasuke snarled. "I'm  _not_  awaiting your answer. Especially since you've already given me one. I told you: forget it," he ordered. "Pretend it's never happened-"

"But it  _has_  happened," the blonde whined. "And it's not that I'm taking you for granted, like, I'm constantly worried that at one point you'll finally realize I'm a total loser, and you'll find yourself a better friend-"

"Just shut up," Sasuke pleaded. "You're making no sense," he sighed after a longer while.

"I simply had no idea that us being together was an option," Naruto grunted. "Sorry for trying to consider it-"

"You've literally  _fainted_  at the thought of us being together," the boy growled at him. "So piss off and go to sleep, we have nothing to talk about and you have nothing to consider. Time's up, I've lost my interest," he continued, his voice cold and distant. Naruto pouted at him but it just deepened the scoff on the other boy's face.

"Running away is what you are best at," the blonde barked. "The moment something isn't going your way, you abandon your post and go rogue," he complained. Sasuke glared at him for the longest time. Then he got up and staggered out of the room. "You've just made my point!" Naruto yelled after him. "If you were a my little pony, you would have a running shoe tattooed on your ass!" he shouted. It didn't make the other boy return. The blonde swallowed a curse, turning on his back, and gluing his eyes to the ceiling.

Sasuke was obnoxious. And he still acted like a goddamn kid, unable to accept a failure. It was probably because he wasn't used to them the way Naruto was. For Sasuke it's always been one success after another. Back in the days, when they were still little, Naruto admired him for it. Later on, he started envying him. Right now he felt kind of sorry for him. The boy was totally unprepared for adulthood.

* * *

 

When Naruto woke up, he immediately wished he didn't. His head was pulsating with pain, there was a desert in his mouth, and, what was absolutely the worst, he still remembered what happened last night. He rolled towards the edge of the bed, and sat up. He felt like shit. And to think that he could've been home! His dad would have made him pancakes, and there would be fresh coffee waiting for him... And now he woke up to no breakfast and angry Sasuke. Guh. And it was morning. Mornings were the worst.

The blonde entered the living room/kitchen combo. He rubbed his eyes, not believing what he saw. He expected his friends to be dying of dehydration but they looked... fine. What was even more bizarre was the fact that Sasuke looked as if he had already went jogging. And that was impossible. Sasuke didn't exist until 10 am, and it was barely  _8_  am. There was no way in hell that he would wake up hungover and go running, nah-ah. The only logical explanation was that lizardmen actually did exist. And they took the bodies of Naruto's friends to mess with him.

"Look, who finally graced us with his presence," Kiba exclaimed so loud that Shikamaru covered his ears. "I thought you've died in there, dude-"

"Good morning to you, too," Naruto greeted his friends, taking a seat by the table. Sasuke was sitting opposite of him; he was wearing earphones, and was listening to music. He acted as if he didn't notice Naruto entering. The blonde frowned at him. It did nothing. He poked the brunette's shoulder to make him pay attention. Sasuke looked at him, seemingly disinterested. He took out one earphone. "I've said: good morning," the blonde mumbled out. Sasuke rolled his eyes, and returned to ignoring the world. "Why are you so prissy?" Naruto questioned, well aware that it was absolutely pointless.

"Yeah, that's  _so_  out of character for him," Shikamaru yawned. "We were all worried sick-"

"Oh, shut up," the blonde whined. "What are we doing today?" he asked to change the subject.

"We need to buy some food," Kiba replied, sipping on his tea. "Then there's beach, and in the evening... I have absolutely no idea. If you're still offering to drive, we can go clubbing but it'll suck for you since you'll be the designated driver-"

"We can continue our adventure," Chouji chimed in. "If I remember correctly, we've almost broke Sasuke out of prison," he said.

"Let's not," Shikamaru interrupted him. "I did some research, and it turns out that there are buses coursing between this town and some nearby cities. It'll be a little bit inconvenient but it's our best option," he sighed.

"Look at you, tiger," Kiba shouted, patting the boy in his back. "I never thought I'd see  _you_  insisting on going out," he laughed.

"I'd do anything to not have to see you ruin role-playing games," he muttered. Then there was a weird whimpering sound. Naruto glanced at his friends. No, it couldn't be them. He looked around, searching for the source of the noise.

"Oh yeah, I totally forgot," Kiba exclaimed. "Guess what I've found during my morning jog with Sasuke-"

"Your  _what_?" the blonde asked. He couldn't believe what he has just heard. It was absurd.

"My morning jog with Sasuke," the boy repeated, visibly unaware of how surreal it was. Naruto blinked, pinching himself to make sure that he wasn't still asleep. He flinched in pain. All right. Everyone went nuts. That was possible. Why not. "I woke up, I saw Sasuke lying on the living room floor, and when I asked him what he was doing, he said he was warming up. And then he called me a lazy loser, so I felt obliged to join him. Bastard runs pretty fast," Kiba chirped. Naruto doubted that Sasuke had been warming up. He probably somehow ended up on the floor, and then was trying to save his face. Because seriously, Sasuke didn't exist before 10 am. "And you know, I thought that running with him was the worst idea since we've agreed to play Shikamaru's game but then I saw this little guy," Kiba murmured, finally reaching under the table and raising a... Dog as if he was the new lion king. "I called him Akamaru-"

"He's white," Naruto noted.

"Yeah, he is  _now_ ," the boy agreed, talking in baby voice. "But you'll see, he'll grow big and strong, and he'll be coated in the blood of my enemies-"

"You don't have any enemies," Chouji interrupted him. "Besides, your mom will never agree-"

"How could she say no to these eyes?" Kiba inquired, shoving the puppy into the other boy's face. Naruto shrugged his shoulders. His mom was a vet, and his house was very often crowded with animals. One time, they even had a fox. Naruto liked him because he used to pee into Sasuke's shoes whenever he was visiting. The blonde smiled at the pleasant memories, unconsciously trying to catch his best friend's gaze. He didn't. Sasuke was still completely engulfed in whatever he was doing on his phone.

"If she won't agree, we can take care of him and find him a new home," Naruto promised Kiba. The boy shot him a betrayed look.

"Don't get your hopes up, buddy," Shikamaru said. "Maybe someone's already looking for him. You'll need to take him to a vet or something," he added. "And I don't think there's one in this shithole," he sighed.

"I'll drive you to a city tomorrow," Naruto offered. "I'll take it easy tonight." He didn't feel like drinking anyways. Whenever he was drunk, he was doing stupid shit. Like yesterday with Kiba- Naruto covered his mouth. Damn. They made out yesterday, didn't they? And Sasuke caught them. The blonde stole a quick glance at his friends. None of them acted weird. Maybe Kiba forgot about it all. Or maybe he was just this good at pretending?

The blonde bit the insides of his cheeks. Yesterday, he didn't even have time to think whether he liked that kiss or not. It was different from the one he had shared with Sasuke. There was no passion in it. With Sasuke it was far more intense but, then again, Sasuke was generally intense. Naruto tapped his fingers on the tabletop. So he still didn't know anything.

* * *

 

The whole day was like this. Naruto and Kiba would have fun with Chouji and Shikamaru tagging along. Sasuke was there only in his body. He almost didn't talk, and it was pretty worrisome. And he spent the entire day texting. Naruto didn't know with whom but it didn't really matter. It was already evening, and they were in their room, preparing themselves to go out.

"Remember Sakura?" Sasuke questioned out of the blue. Naruto gawked at him. He wasn't sure whether he was more surprised because the boy decided to stop the silent treatment or because he mentioned Sakura. It was probably the latter. The blonde nodded to let Sasuke know that he did indeed remember the girl. "She's my girlfriend," the boy informed him in a grave tone.

"Since  _when_  do you like her?!" Naruto asked, getting closer to the other boy. This was the most unexpected thing he's seen that year. Including Sasuke's orgasm face.

"I don't," was the answer. The blonde let out a silent scream into his joined hands. Sasuke was infuriating. And a dick.

"What are you doing?!" Naruto whined, slumping on the bed lifelessly. Now he had to think of a way to fix this mess. Preferably without hurting Sakura in the process. After all, it wasn't her fault that her crush was an idiot.

"I'm doing you a favor," Sasuke explained, as if he was stating the obvious. "Now nobody will think we're gay for each other-"

"I don't care about what they think-"

"You  _do_. You were terrified that they might find out about you and me-"

"Sasuke, for fuck's sake, yes, I  _was_  terrified. Past tense.  _You_  can get away with anything,  _I_  have to worry about my reputation-"

" _Right_ -"

"Sasuke, look. You have absolutely no fashion sense. Seriously. I'm always amazed that your mom let you out of the house looking the way you do, and yet girls consider you cool and handsome. Do you know in how much shit I or the other guys would be in if we were dressing like you? I mean, damn, nobody would ever talk to us, like, no offence but you tend to look as if you were regularly sleeping under a bridge-"

"Are you done?" the brunette growled.

"Yeah, you could say that," Naruto relented. "The thing is that life is...  _different_  for you," he sighed. "And you're not the most empathic person around-"

"And you're not the brightest one," Sasuke retorted. "You're impossible-"

"No,  _you_  are impossible," the blonde grunted. "How do you imagine yourself being with Sakura? I mean, that's just cruel. She won't be happy with you, you won't be happy with her," he explained. "Besides, did you ask her to date you via a goddamn text message? Like, seriously, this is so lame-"

"She seemed pleased with it," Sasuke huffed.

"Because she's pretty much obsessed with you," the blonde barked back. "I swear to gods, this is ridiculous," he scowled. "I thought you'd  _at least_  find yourself a different boyfriend-"

"I've never said I was gay. Besides, I'm not interested in silver medals," Sasuke muttered under his breath.

"Then give us a chance," the boy exclaimed. "First you're avoiding me, and now... I don't even know what to call it but it was stupid as fuck. And I have no idea how you'll fix it but you have to do it asap," he lectured. "Dump her, apologize to her, pretend it's never happened. I don't know, tell her that I've stolen your phone and decided to prank her..."

"She'll hate you," the boy noted, visibly surprised. Naruto shrugged his shoulders. It didn't matter right now. And Sakura never liked him anyways. He sat up and patted the bed, gesturing Sasuke to take a seat near him. The boy listened to him.

"This isn't a competition of who will screw up more before this trip ends, right?" the blonde joked. Sasuke shook his head. "Good, because one more stupid action like this and you'd have won," Naruto snickered. "All right, let's call your  _girlfriend_ -"

"You're being a jerk," Sasuke complained. "I'll just tell her it was a mistake. There's no reason to get you involved," he sighed.

Naruto violently shook his head. "No, no,  _no_ ," he opposed. "You'll break her heart, like, she wanted to date you the moment she saw you, and that was  _eons_  ago. If she'll think it was me being a jackass, she'll believe she still has a chance-"

"She doesn't," Sasuke interrupted him, turning his head to look at the blonde. Naruto never really paid any attention to it but now that he got a closer look at his best friend, he had to admit that his face was...pretty. Not that he would say it out loud. Like, he would get decapitated if he did it.

"She  _is_  your girlfriend," Naruto reminded Sasuke. "So don't be so quick about saying who has a chance, and who doesn't," he chirped. It only made Sasuke scoff in irritation. Not that Naruto expected any other result. Unfortunately for Sasuke, him being angry didn't impress Naruto all that much any longer.

"If she'll learn that it was me, she might hate me, and perhaps you'd have a chance-"

"Yeah, if I were a total jerk, I would probably agree to it," Naruto interrupted the other boy. "Look, you were a selfish asshole, so now you should-"

"I did it for  _you_ ," Sasuke growled back.

"Then you were totally misguided," the blonde sighed. "I  _used_  to like her, okay? So right now... I mean, she and I aren't even friends anymore. So I have nothing to lose. And when it comes to people thinking we're gay for each other... There's no helping it anyways. Besides, while I do care about other people's opinion, I mostly care about, you know, the close circle of friends. And they're cool with it-"

"I'm  _so_  glad I have their approval," Sasuke uttered, narrowing his eyes. Naruto cleared his throat. All right, fine, that didn't sound too good, no wonder his friend was being sarcastic.

"Just let me handle this," the blonde pleaded. "There's no reason to hurt Sakura's feelings-"

"She'll never believe it was you," Sasuke interrupted him. "You're making way too many spelling errors," he sighed. "I have no idea how you're able to do it. You have an autocorrect installed on your phone, and yet you manage to misspell words. Reading your texts is like a game of scrabble-"

"Give me a break," Naruto whined, rolling his eyes. "You're replying fast enough so it can't be this bad-"

"Thanks to you, I'm fluent in gibberish," the boy snickered, reaching for his cell. "It started over a text message so it may end in one as well," he muttered. The blonde lay on his back, staring at the ceiling. Did he really consider Sasuke his best friend?  _Why_? He was a total moron.

"That's so pathetic I can't even find words to describe it properly," Naruto mumbled out, still deep in disbelief.

"Your vocabulary isn't the reason I'm friends with you," the boy chuckled, audibly amused by himself. Naruto huffed at the comment. To be honest, he had no idea why Sasuke liked him. He generally didn't like people, and when he actually did, they were weird as fuck. Like Juugo. Or Karin. Or Suigetsu. Or Itachi. Yeah, his brother was definitely the weirdest person Naruto has ever met. "And done," Sasuke said, tapping something on his phone. The blonde glanced at the screen. He regretted it a lot.

"Really?  _I'm breaking up with you_? That's all you're gonna tell her? She deserves more," he complained.

"Why? It's not like she actually cares about anything more," Sasuke replied, lying next to Naruto. The blonde sat up, pointing an accusing finger at the other boy. He wanted to tell him he was wrong but he wasn't so certain about it. Sasuke could actually be onto something. Naruto retracted the finger, feeling completely deflated. There was something wrong with how Sasuke handled the situation but, aside from violating the rules of nice behavior, there wasn't a lot to complain about. And this felt even more wrong.

"You won this round," he sighed. The brunette smiled victoriously. Oh yes, he  _loved_  being right. Naruto grabbed a pillow, and hit Sasuke with it to prevent him from getting too full of himself. It did disrupt his triumph. Sasuke caught the pillow, and pulled it, trying to snatch it from Naruto's hands. The blonde tightened his grip and while he didn't let go off his weapon, he did fall face first into Sasuke's chest. He raised his head to continue the fight but something stopped him. This something was a pair of black eyes, which was way too close. Naruto sucked in air, forcing himself to calm down. He felt weird lightheadedness. Sasuke's lips parted, and Naruto had no idea why he would pay any attention to it. He could feel the other boy's breath on his face. His heart was pounding in his chest, and, what was most absurd, Sasuke wasn't telling him to back off. This trance was violently stopped by a sound of doors being thrown open. Naruto practically jumped out of the bed, tripping, and falling on the floor.  _Again_. Was this a theme or what?

"We need to go out in less than five minutes, so I hope you're ready," Shikamaru stated in a dull tone, not showing any signs of surprise at the sight. Then he simply left without waiting for an answer, and closed the doors behind himself. Naruto swallowed a curse.

"What was that?" Sasuke questioned. "Why did you jump out like that?"

Naruto had no idea why he did that. Not that he would admit it out loud. But he did know that if Shikamaru hadn't interrupted them, he would... He wasn't certain whether he would muster enough courage but for a split second he did want to kiss Sasuke. So he  _was_  gay for his best friend. "He startled me," the blonde mumbled out. All right, finding out that you  _would_  fuck your best friend if given a chance was pretty big news. And Naruto had no idea what to do with it. He was already too late, wasn't he? Sasuke had said his time was up, and that he wasn't interested anymore but this didn't have to be true. "Sasuke," he started uncertainly. He just needed to say that. Maybe not everything was lost.

"We have to go," the boy reminded him, clearly unaware of what Naruto was going through at the moment.

"No, we need to-"

"Guys, seriously, how much longer do you need?" Kiba whined, barging into the room, the puppy sleeping in his arms. Naruto had to admit that the dog was pretty cute. And Kiba was already completely in love with him, taking him everywhere they went. To be honest, it was somewhat annoying. Kiba acted like a young mother, cooing over Akamaru and demanding the best for him.

"We're ready," Sasuke told him, once again oblivious to Naruto's predicament. The blonde made a face at him. That showed him. "What?" Sasuke questioned. Oh, so he did pay attention. Surprise, surprise.

"We need to talk," Naruto stated. The brunette rolled his eyes, muttering something under his breath. "It's important-"

"Later," the boy decided, following Kiba into the corridor. Naruto let out a silent scream. Was  _this_  the guy he was gay for? Life was totally unfair.

* * *

 

The ride to the nearest city was rather uneventful. Only Kiba kept whining about leaving the dog alone. This continued even when they  _finally_  reached the club. He was so worried about the pup (which was probably asleep anyways), that he ignored a girl, who was hitting on him, choosing to sit by the bar with Naruto and Sasuke, whose phone kept on ringing.

"Pick it up," the blonde insisted for the umpteenth time that hour. He knew it was Sakura. No wonder. If someone wanted to become his boyfriend, and then dumped him on the same day he would demand answers as well. "You owe it to her."

"I don't," Sasuke repeated his mantra. At this point Naruto didn't even have enough strength to get properly angry at his best friend.

"You do," Kiba said. It was their new routine. The phone would ring, they would whine about it for a minute or so, and then Kiba would start complaining about his puppy. At least Shikamaru and Chouji seemed to have a good time. Chouji was dancing, and Shikamaru was arguing with a girl, who had mirrored his every move on the dance floor. For normal people it would be awful but these two seemed so invested in it that it had to be love. Especially since now, as Naruto overheard, they were arguing over politics, frantically trying to hide how happy they were that they managed to find yet another thing they disagreed on.

"I don't," Sasuke stated in a singsong voice. The phone rang again. This time it was Naruto's. The blonde took it out of his pocket, staring at the screen. Sakura. He was screwed.

"She's calling  _me_ ," he whispered in an accusing tone. Of course. Whenever she couldn't reach Sasuke on her own, she would try to do it through Naruto. At one point he thought they were friends but they actually weren't. She just wanted to hang out with his friend, and not with him. It was a rather painful realization. That was why he blew up in Sasuke's face, what resulted in them not talking to each other for over three months. It was the stupidest thing Naruto had ever done. And it was so immature! Everyone knew Shikamaru had a soft spot for Ino, but when she started dating his best friend, he acted with dignity, like a friend would. Naruto didn't. "Hello," he greeted Sakura.

"Hi," the girl replied, tears audible in her voice. Great. Really, fucking wonderful. This was exactly what he needed. "Is Sasuke nearby?"

"Yes," he said. Sasuke rolled his eyes. What, did he think Naruto would lie for him? Oh no, good mister, you need to take responsibility for your actions. "Do you want to talk to him?"

"...no," the girl mumbled out. She was practically choking on her tears. And her answer was rather  _surprising_. She did call Sasuke like a hundred times already. Why would she do that if she didn't want to talk to him? "I know that he's just being shy," she stated with certainty Naruto would envy if she wasn't so wrong. "Tell him I understand, and that while it hurts, I'm not angry at him," she concluded. Naruto mentally facepalmed. He hated how she acted around Sasuke. Like a total pushover. And she definitely wasn't one.

"Sure," he promised against his better judgement. Someone had to tell her it was a lost cause. Preferably someone, who wasn't Naruto. Maybe, if Sasuke told her he had absolutely no interest in her, it would work. Yeah, it  _had_  to. "Sakura says she isn't angry at you," he muttered. Sasuke shrugged his shoulders. Oh yeah, he didn't care. "You should say something," he reminded the brunette.

"What do you want from me?" Sasuke growled. " _You_  told me to dump her-"

"You did  _what_?!" Sakura yelled at Naruto. Fantastic. This trip was getting worse and worse with every passing  _minute_.

"It's not what it looks like," he tried to defend himself. At least Sasuke looked as if he felt guilty. He even reached out an arm, gesturing the blonde to hand over him the cell. Yeah, this wasn't happening. Sakura kept cursing him. "All right, fine, I  _told_  him to dump you but I did it because he asked you out for all the wrong reasons-"

"It's not your business," the girl hissed at him. She had a point. It  _wasn't_  his business. How did he get himself involved? "What, you think that you're so fucking special that only you'd do it for the right reasons?"

"...no," Naruto answered. "Look, I'm not into you anymore, okay? And, to be honest, I think you want to be with him for a wrong reason as well-"

"When did you become qualified to decide what is wrong and what is right?" Sakura questioned. She sounded pissed off. No wonder. Sasuke leaned forward, getting dangerously close. His nose was almost touching Naruto's, and the blonde felt as if some crazy doctor transplanted his heart into his neck.

"I'm gay," Sasuke said into the phone, and returned to his previous, much safer position. Kiba gawked at the news. Sakura also didn't say anything. The silence was a true bliss. Sasuke sipped on his drink as if nothing out of ordinary was happening. Then he leaned in again. "Sorry, I guess-"

"No, it's fine," Sakura replied, sounding like a robot. Naruto felt weird. He shouldn't be a part of this but he was. And it seemed that neither Sasuke nor Sakura were bothered by it, taking his presence as something obvious and natural. The blonde wanted to give the phone to Sasuke but he rejected it.

"So," Naruto mumbled out, "how are you? How was your Summer?"

"Fine, thank you," Sakura replied. Her mind obviously wasn't there. "Take good care of him," she pleaded in a hushed voice a while later. Naruto nodded. Oh yeah, she couldn't see him. He was opening his mouth to say 'yes,' when she goodbyed him, immediately disconnecting.

The blonde put the phone down, staring at Sasuke out of corner of his eye. He just came out. To Sakura. He had to know that if she knew, it meant Ino would knows in milliseconds, and this meant the whole world would know in less than a minute. Naruto wondered if this was what Sasuke wanted. Probably not. After all, he refused to state his sexual orientation twice already.

"Hey, we should celebrate," Kiba howled, breaking the uncomfortable silence. "This round is on me so take whatever you want-"

"I want to get wasted," Sasuke decided. Naruto patted him on the shoulder, rubbing small circles with his thumb. The other boy swatted his hand away. A disaster. Another one. They should have gotten used to them by now.

"Then order the strongest thing on the menu," Kiba suggested, visibly looking for Naruto's approval. The blonde nodded his head. It was a good thing that Kiba had found a puppy. Now Naruto had an excuse to drink less, so he would be able to take care of his best friend. Because Sasuke  _would_  need it. Eventually.

* * *

 

And of course he did. His head was swaying from side to side, and it looked as if he had trouble sitting straight. If it wasn't for Naruto's hand supporting him, Sasuke would've ended up on the floor hours ago.

"I'm going home," he decided in a shaky voice.

"We're going with you, just let us tell Shikamaru and Chouji that we're leaving," Kiba insisted. Naruto discreetly shook his head behind Sasuke's back. "I mean I'm staying here," he mumbled out.

"Yeah, let's take you home," Naruto said, forcing himself to sound joyful.

"...whatever," Sasuke relented, heavily landing on the floor. The blonde put one arm around him to guide him through the mass of dancing people. It was oddly natural. Well, it wasn't the first time he did it but never before had he thought of  _how_  it felt. It felt good. He could sense Sasuke's body heat through his shirt, and the feeling was quite comforting. Even if drunk Sasuke was nothing but trouble.

"So," Naruto started when they finally left the club, "you're gay-"

"I don't know," the other boy whined, "I've said it to get her off our backs-"

"I see," the blonde murmured. "The whole school is going to think you are, though," he informed Sasuke, who just scoffed at it, "We've got your back so don't worry-"

"I'm not  _worried_ ," he barked. "I just didn't think it through, and it's your fault-"

"It's not," Naruto protested. And hey, it actually wasn't his fault. It was Sasuke screwing up to cover up his previous screw-up.

"Whatever," the brunette grunted. It sounded almost as if he admitted he was wrong. Ahh, music to Naruto's ears. "You're so slow," Sasuke complained, already seated on the bus stop bench.

"We have like fifteen minutes of waiting anyways, so..." Naruto's thoughts drifted away. He had wanted to talk with Sasuke about his I-might-be-gay-for-you feelings but something was telling him it wasn't the right time to do it. On the other hand, seeing how this trip was getting worse and worse with every passing second, there was a chance that there simply wouldn't be a good time for it. "I think I wanted to kiss you tonight," he confessed, sitting next to the other boy.

"I'm honored," Sasuke replied. It sounded sarcastic. And it definitely wasn't the reaction Naruto was going for or expected. Stupid bastard.

"So that's that," the blonde sighed, giving up on doing anything more for the time being. He would try again tomorrow. Or the day after tomorrow. Whenever. "Sorry for taking you here-"

"It was an eye opening experience," Sasuke snorted. "But it is terrible, so you  _should_  be sorry," he added with a tired huff. "Although Kiba is less of an idiot than I thought him to be," he admitted. Naruto snickered at the comment. If only they both knew they didn't hate one another too much.

"How do you like being single?" Naruto questioned half-jokingly. Sasuke rolled eyes. It didn't look as if he was planning to answer the question. "Why didn't you do anything before?" the blonde asked. The other boy sent him a puzzled look. "After that camping, I mean," Naruto clarified. "Why wait a whole month?"

"It was new to me as well," Sasuke sighed. "And I assumed you didn't want to talk about it," he continued. "But then you've asked me to come here with you, and I was thinking that perhaps you were hoping to repeat that-"

"What, you thought I wanted to get you drunk and jack you off?" Naruto inquired, feeling somewhat offended. He wasn't like this. Sasuke should have known better. He wouldn't do something like this  _knowingly_. Meaning that he wouldn't get him  _drunk_. The blonde gasped at his own thoughts. Oh. So it was already decided. He wouldn't mind jacking Sasuke off. Great. Really.

"I guess," the boy laughed. He hiccupped. Naruto snickered. Sasuke covered his nose with a hand, and hummed, holding a note. Well, it worked, he did get rid of the hiccup but it also looked silly as hell. "Our bus is coming," he sighed, waving at the driver, so she would stop. They really were in the middle of nowhere.

They got into an empty bus, taking a seat situated in the back of the vehicle. This was where the cool kids used to sit back in the elementary school. Now it was the place for those, who wanted to drink without the teacher noticing. Naruto had been rather surprised that Sasuke was a part of it. He was an annoyingly good student, yet he managed to make the school staff dislike him. A true gift.

"We could skip the getting drunk out of our minds part," the blonde suggested in a half voice. Sasuke raised an eyebrow at the offer. "You know, for science," Naruto whispered, trying to laugh it off.

"For science?" the boy questioned, drawling out the last word. "I don't think so," he snickered. "I've already told you to forget it," he reminded.

"Yeah but why? Like, what's the worst thing that could happen? We'll be probably embarrassed as hell but this would be  _it_ , and damn, I'm so used to being embarrassed that I probably won't even notice it," Naruto argued in a whiny voice. Sasuke stared back at him, studying his face with his shifty eyes.

"...you're still shorter than me," he murmured, evidently pleased with himself. Naruto waited for him to say something smart but he didn't. The blonde mentally facepalmed.

"I'm pretty certain I'm not," he replied, giving up on receiving any answer to what he had said before. Sasuke glanced at him from the corner of his eye, as if he was measuring his height. Then he sighed, pulling himself up, using the back of a seat. "What are you doing?" Naruto asked.

"Let's check it," Sasuke demanded. The blonde rolled his eyes, getting up. The bus was shaky, and Sasuke wasn't able to stand straight even when they had been outside of it. Naruto grabbed the other boy's shoulder, supporting him. He was surprisingly heavy. Sasuke got closer to him, raising one of his arms to see which one of them was taller. "Fuck," he cursed in a raspy voice. "I bet it's because of your shoes-"

"Like hell it is," Naruto protested. "I'm taller-"

"You're  _not_ , we're just even," Sasuke corrected him. The bus took a turn, making Sasuke fall into his arms. Naruto wasn't able to keep his balance, so they both ended up on the bus floor. Pain exploded in his head. Great. Now he'll have a second horn. Symmetry was important. And hey, falling on the floor  _was_  the theme. Only now there was Sasuke lying on top of him. Fabulous. "How are you?" Sasuke inquired, doing absolutely nothing to stand up.

"Fine," Naruto told him. "You?" he questioned. The brunette sighed, raising himself on his elbows.

"Me too," he said, standing up, and reaching out a hand. Naruto accepted it. This was a mistake. All they achieved was falling again. And this time Sasuke head-butted him in the forehead. Three horns. Woot. "This is getting absurd," the brunette muttered.

"Yup," Naruto chuckled. "We can always stay here," he suggested. Sasuke rolled off from him, climbing on the seat. " _Or_  you can just leave me here," Naruto let out a sad huff, massaging his forehead and feeling small bumps. One more day like this and he'll run out of place for them. He got up, taking the seat next to Sasuke, who was currently busy with staring through the window. As if he could see anything. The road was dark, and-

"This is our stop," the boy informed him, staggering towards the exit. Naruto followed him. So this talk was  _another_  failure. And yes, Naruto  _could_  take no for an answer but this... This was weird. Kiba had told him that perhaps Sasuke didn't want to have his hopes first raised and then crushed but this wasn't like him. He wasn't a coward. And he did admit a couple of times that he was attracted to Naruto. Maybe he realized that this was all there was? He had said that he wasn't interested anymore, so perhaps it was about feelings. They were good friends, this much was certain but was there more? "Hurry up, you moron," Sasuke whined. The blonde jumped out of the vehicle, which doors were already closing. All right, fine, that wasn't the best time to think about it. He followed the other boy. At least the bungalow wasn't too far from the bus stop.

So they liked one another. A lot. Naruto knew he would jump into fire if he thought it would help Sasuke, and he was sure it was mutual. They had each other's backs. And Naruto had to admit that whenever he had been imagining his future, Sasuke was always there. True, he also thought of having a wife and kids but they were faceless. The blonde hummed under his nose. If the question was whether he loved Sasuke, then the obvious answer was yes. But he had no idea if he was  _in_  love with him.

"What is it?" Sasuke questioned, sounding resigned. Oh yeah, he could read Naruto like a book. A terrifying ability.

"Do you  _like_  me?" Naruto asked. Well, he had nothing to lose. And drunk Sasuke's aim was pretty much nonexistent so he wasn't risking getting hurt.

"No, I hang out with you because I like to torture myself," the boy sighed. Naruto showed him a tongue but, apparently, Sasuke was above replying in a similar manner. Or he simply didn't see it since he didn't have eyes on the back of his head. "Why?" He inquired after a longer while, audibly unhappy with himself.

"Because I am wondering if I  _like_  you," the blonde answered. Sasuke turned his head to him just to send him a disappointed look. "I mean, I know I like you but I have no idea if I  _like_  you," he clarified.

"Stop it, Naruto," the boy scoffed. "Why do you have to be so stubborn?" He complained.

"Because I might miss out on something amazing," the blonde barked. "Look, sorry for before. Why can't you forget  _this_  instead of the other things?" He whined, walking right into Sasuke's back. "Why stop all of the sudden-"

He wasn't allowed to end the sentence. Sasuke turned around, facing him, and crushing his lips against Naruto's. The blonde gasped, too surprised to return the kiss or even savor it. To be honest, it was lousy and his teeth hurt.

"Here," Sasuke muttered. "Happy?"

" _No_ , this was too fast, like, how am I supposed to know if I liked it or not-"

Sasuke glared daggers at him before kissing him again. The brunette wanted to back out immediately after a tiny smooch but Naruto held him tight, cupping the back of his head, and pulling him closer. Their lips connected again, this time slower. The blonde hummed in joy, embracing Sasuke's back, his tongue entering the other boy's mouth. It was wet and hot in there, and it tasted of alcohol. His lips felt as if they were sleeping or as if electricity went right through them. Sasuke, whose body had been tense, relaxed, finally kissing Naruto back properly. The blonde shifted his feet, feeling Sasuke's hard-on on his groin. All right, this was weird. Not certain what to do, he rubbed it with his hand, deciding to change the adjective. It wasn't weird, it was hot. And he could feel himself getting hard as well. Sasuke let out a sigh into Naruto's mouth before ending the kiss and backing out a little bit. This was a rather new sight. Sasuke's lips were somewhat swollen and darker than usually, his normally impeccable hair a mess... He generally looked disheveled. And as if he regretted  _everything_. Literally everything.

"You're much better at kissing than Kiba," Naruto chirped. Sasuke narrowed his eyes at him. "All right, fine, this was lame. But now I know-"

"You know you'd do me," Sasuke interrupted him. He sounded pissed off. Naruto bit the insides of his cheeks, quite lost. Sasuke should be happy, right? "Congratulations, you're not straight. Do whatever you want with this information," the boy added, turning on his heel and marching towards the bungalow.

"You've made it sound  _horrible_ ," Naruto exclaimed, catching up to him. "You  _know_  me, you  _know_  I'm not some random asshole," he argued. Sasuke stopped in his track, his shoulders hanging low.

"...if you were a random asshole, I wouldn't have bothered myself with talking to you," the boy admitted after an awkward moment of silence. "But it doesn't change anything-"

" _What_  do you want from me?" Naruto whined. He was slowly losing his patience.

"Nothing, Naruto," Sasuke replied, starting to walk again. Oh sure, keep doing this. They could have been over this in a millisecond but  _no_ , Sasuke has to prolong  _everything_. Naruto was pretty certain that right now he was doing it just for the sake of prolonging.

"You're not happy," the blonde pointed out, following him. "You're not happy because of  _me_ , and you have absolutely no idea how much it irks me," Naruto confessed. "Like, seriously, I'm physically unable to be content with my life if you are not-"

"It will pass," the boy barked at him. Naruto rolled his eyes. Obviously, Sasuke couldn't see it but, to be honest, Naruto had done it for himself anyways.

"Just tell me why you don't want me-"

"I'm not obliged to tell you anything," Sasuke muttered. Well, he was right. Naruto reached a dead end. So much for talking. "And it's not about what  _I_  want-"

"People usually say 'it's not you, it's me,' but, of course, you had to be different," Naruto mumbled out, thinking Sasuke didn't hear him.

" _You_  are the one, who's not certain, who thinks he owes me something, who doesn't even know if he," Sasuke paused to turn around and make quotation marks with his fingers, " _likes_  me," he concluded, sounding as if he wanted to erase the word 'likes' from existence. As if it personally offended him. Maybe it did. "This is me saving your sorry ass  _again_ -"

"You realize you don't have to do it, right?" Naruto interrupted the other boy.

"I wish I didn't," the brunette snarled, once again headed towards the bungalow. It seemed that they would never reach it. And it was supposed to be a seven minutes long walk. Perhaps Einstein really was onto something with his theory of relativity. But the more pressing matter was that Naruto had absolutely no idea what Sasuke was getting at. He wished he didn't realize it? He wished he didn't have to save Naruto? The blonde pondered over the issue. Well, it's Sasuke we're talking about so it was probably the latter.

"You seriously don't," Naruto informed the boy, who let out an exaggerated sigh. "What?"

"Nothing, let's go to sleep," Sasuke pleaded. They finally reached the doors and were welcomed with a happy barking. "I don't think this dog is going to grow as big as Kiba wants him to be-"

"Don't change the subject," Naruto whined. Akamaru waggled his tail, oblivious to what was going on. The blonde kneeled, petting the pup. He probably wanted to go for a walk. He was on one a few hours earlier but another wouldn't hurt. "We need to walk him-"

"You do it," Sasuke decided, disappearing in the house. The dog followed him, playfully attacking a leg of his jeans. "He takes after Kiba," the boy muttered. Naruto choked on an unwanted laughter. "Animals hate me," the brunette complained.

"He just wants to play with you," Naruto said, grabbing the dog, and putting on a leash. Sasuke leaned on the door frame, watching the scene. "Come on, it's not like you can avoid me for the rest of your life," Naruto argued. "Especially now, when we're here," he added. Sasuke rolled his eyes, giving in, and walking outside again. "So, as I've said before, you don't have to save me-"

"This is getting boring," the brunette scoffed.

"Just shut up, you're making things harder than they need to be," Naruto barked. "And stop trying to live my life, I'm doing pretty well, thank you very much-"

"I'm not trying to live your life," Sasuke sighed, sitting on the doorstep. He looked drunk. His face was flushed as if he had a fever. "I wish it didn't happen," he confessed after a longer while. Akamaru ran up to him, licking his hand. "Gross," the boy snorted.

"It's not like I want to  _do_  you," Naruto said. "It's not about sex," he clarified. "But the guys said that it's impossible to keep the thing we have and have a different relationship. Like, we would either be unfair to our SOs or our friendship would become less... I don't know, less than it is right now. And they said that the only thing we're lacking is physicality so I focused on it. And the thing is that I think it would be possible-"

"And what if it isn't?" Sasuke inquired, resting his head on his hand, lazily playing with the dog.

"We're pretty great even without being physical," the blonde murmured. "And it's hard to miss something you've never had so I can't say it would be too big of a sacrifice," he chuckled.

"...fine," Sasuke agreed reluctantly. He leveled Naruto with his shifty eyes. Or tired to. It's the intention that counts. It didn't matter that his glare was unfocused and that it looked funnier than intimidating. "I'm going to regret that, am I not?"

"Maybe," the blonde snickered, sitting next to his best friend and patting his back in a patronizing way. "So... Like... You're totally wasted right now, and I'm tired as fuck-"

"Sounds sexy," Sasuke huffed in a weak attempt at joking. His head landed on Naruto's shoulder. It felt... Right. As if it belonged there. "When is this dog going to do his business? It's just running around," he complained.

"He's young," Naruto defended the pup. "And he doesn't know you have something more important to do, like, he was all alone for five hours, so now he needs to be played with, and-"

"Whatever," Sasuke interrupted him, blowing hot puffs of air into Naruto's neck. It tickled but in a rather pleasant way. The blonde smiled to himself. Maybe this trip wasn't so bad after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've said it would be two more chapters tops, and it /will/ be two more chapters tops. So, I have just one more to go. Phew.
> 
> You know, whenever I'm writing something, I get these various ideas, and usually I have to scrap like half of them because 'it's stupid,' 'this is like so ooc,' 'what about pacing you dumb fuck,' and so on, and so on, and with this fic I'm like fuck it. It's really relaxing. So this thing right here isn't a good fic but I think it might be enjoyable ;) I had fun writing it, and I hope you're having fun too :)

**Author's Note:**

> Told you it was going to be silly as fuck. And yeah, at one point there'll be smut, and it'll be so vanilla you'll regret reading it.


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